Because Some Books Change You

Tonight I FINALLY finished Team of Rivals. 

 

You can see it is a bit tattered.  To be fair, I've been working on reading it for a year.  I went to see the movie with Mark last November, and I was reading it by January, so I can only conclude I bought it when I flew home for Christmas.  I remember buying it and then realizing just how big it is.

 

 

But to me, half the fun of reading a book is the experience of reading it, the things it made me think about and the way that interacts my world. 

 

Prior to purchasing this book, I had been working in Springfield, Illinois every once in a while.  In fact, I traveled to our office out there for seven months before I realized our office was right across the street from Lincoln's old house.  Since only 50% of my clients ever showed up, I would wander over to his old house on breaks when my computer wasn't working.  I did the entire tour, visited all of his neighbor's houses. Then I branched out and visited every historic site related to Lincoln in that city. 

 

 

 

In November Mark took me to see the Lincoln movie.  Actually he wanted to take me to a chick flick, but I wanted the Lincoln movie and he kindly obliged.  After the movie I chattered away about different things I had learned about Lincoln.  As he drove me home, he made the comment that he wasn't as in to history as I was - or something along those lines.  It surprised me, because I wouldn't say I'm really all that into history, it is just that.... in this instance, my life sort of took me there.

 

In January, I loved going to court in Lincoln's home town and reading all about him in the same place as he used to practice law. 

 

But the book doesn't just talk about Lincoln, it also talks about the people who ran for president at the same time he did.  And, if you look back at my blog entry from March, The Sting of Disappointment, you will see that reading this book really helped me come to an important conclusion about disappointment.  It actually was pretty pivotal for me.

 

In May, my ex-boyfriend, Aaron came into town.  I had invited him to at least come say hi while he was here and he had ignored me.  I was on my way to the temple when I thought specifically of my conclusion from March and figured I'd take the chance to be ignored again, that I would chose disappointment over never having that chance to visit with him again.  I'm so glad I did.  We ended up dating for a few months.  He came back to church.  I really loved reconnecting with him. We always had a lot of fun together.

 

 

 

 

He lives in Alabama now, so visiting him helped with my perspective about the south as I read about the civil war.  

 

In the midst of reading this book, my friend, Nate Mayer, quite randomly sent me a link about the spirits who appeared in the Saint George Temple who asked, or rather, insisted on having their work done.  (This was in late October.) Abraham Lincoln was among those spirits.  The link Nate sent brought me to another link, which brought me to a book which was written about all of the eminent men (who were not founding fathers or presidents) who made their appearance that day. 

 

 

I ordered the book and devoured it.  Turns out, that Seward was one of the eminent men!  (Seward is one of the rivals.)  I was thrilled to know that (although I am REALLY puzzled at why his wife wasn't one of the eminent women).  But interestingly, I had just finished reading about the turn of the war when I came upon the name of Farragut in this book about the eminent men.  I looked back to my book, and sure enough, he is mentioned on page 655 - he was the Admiral who captured Mobile Bay, Alabama.  This is historically significant because it was a turning point, and because President Lincoln was running for president again, and this positive news put the faith of the people back in him and helped him win an election against McClellan (prior civil war general).  This is especially interesting because the book about the eminent men tells this story:

 

He had given orders which were disregarded by his officers, which led to one of the ships getting torpedoed and sunk.  The next ship almost collided with his ship.  Two very, very bad things at a critical time.  Not quite knowing how to move forward, and knowing that the course of the battle depended on this moment he prayed.  "O God, who created man and gave him reason, direct me what to do.  Shall I go on?" And it seemed as if in answer, he said, a voice commanded, "Go on!"  God had spoken to him, and personal danger could not deter him."

 

"Edging his ship around the others and taking the lead, he shouted his now famous lines:  "Damn the torpedoes!  Full speed!" As they passed between the buoys, many onboard heard the casings of the torpedoes knocking against the copper of the ship's bottom.  Many of the primers snapped audibly, but no torpedo exploded."

 

 

I read "Love is Eternal," in 2005.  It is a book all about Mary Todd Lincoln.  I read most of the book while I was in Thailand, and finished while I was flying home.  I sat next to a Canadian with a large bear, claw tattoo.  I was by the window (i.e. trapped).  Of course, Lincoln dies.  (No surprise, but you know, I cried when I watched the Titanic.)  So, I cried, and cried at the end of that book and the Canadian man felt so bad for me he went to the bathroom and brought me a huge stack of toilet paper.  I used every last piece.  In this book, of course, he dies again.  I read about his death while I was in a hearing two days ago, so it wasn't nearly as bad as it was when I finished Love is Eternal, but still.  Arg, I just hate that he dies RIGHT when things finally start looking up. 

 

 

 

There are just so many great things that this book offered to my life.  I just can't condense them into a blog entry.  My life is definitely richer for having read it.  But by far the best thing is that when I read about really great people I am inspired by them.  The thing I took from Lincoln that I would hope to implement more in my life is his ability to not be vindictive or petty about things.  He was so forgiving that even the south mourned his loss because, at least some of them, recognized that he was their greatest ally after the war.  I just can't help but read about him and feel as if I have just become acquainted with someone who makes me want to be a better person. 

 

Near the very end of the book I found this quote, "Whether it be true or not, I can say for one that I have no other [ambition] so great as that of being truly esteemed of by my fellow men, by rendering myself worthy of their esteem.  How far I shall succeed in gratifying this ambition, is yet to be developed."

 

I truly esteem Lincoln, and feel that he certainly rendered himself worthy of my esteem.  I can only hope that one day, after my life on earth has extinguished, that I can have the privilege of associating with him, or at least meeting him, in the life after this one. 

 

 

 

 

P.S. - if you want to borrow the book, you are welcome.  Just know that my copy is marked up and I'll want it back.